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playing with myself. [LP]

by duffle band

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1.
Do you see what I see? Can you see what I see? Do you see what I see? Can you see what I see? I don’t see myself the way I’ll be I can’t see myself the way I’ll be (Why don’t you just give up, you’re a failure? Why don’t you just give up, you’re a failure?) I don’t see myself the way I’ll be I can’t see myself the way I’ll be I don’t see myself the way I’ll be I don’t see myself, nor do I even see me Nor can I see see anyone or me Nor can I see see anyone or me Do you see what I see? Can you be what I be? Do you do what I do? You’re at the right church, but on the wrong pew (Why don’t you just give up, you’re a failure? Why don’t you just give up, you’re a failure?) You can’t see yourself the way that I can’t I can’t see myself the way that you can (Why don’t you just give up, you’re a failure? Why don’t you just give up, you’re a failure?) You can be yourself the way the I can’t I can’t be myself the way that you can You can be yourself the way the I can’t I can’t be myself the way that you can I don’t know myself, nor do I even know me I don’t know how everyone sees me No one knows me, so I can’t be me
2.
She licks another envelope to deliver another letter he’ll never read So many words left unsaid, could you really say you blame her? Every night she visits him, umbrella in hand, yeah she never sleeps Sick of laying next to air, could you really say you blame her? And so she screams, there’s gotta be (gotta be, gotta be) And so she screams, there’s gotta be (gotta be, oh, there’s gotta be, gotta be) He still runs the flower shop, 63 years, every day Hoping she’ll once return, waiting nearly 32 years Contemplating retirement, he still keeps his faith Azaleas were her favorite, but every one he sells, he’ll shed a tear And so he screams, there’s gotta be (gotta be, oh there’s gotta be, gotta be) And so he screams, there’s gotta be (gotta be, oh there’s gotta be, gotta be)
3.
There’s nothin’ I can change about myself There’s nothin’ I like about myself I’m a victim of empty confidence Exhibit A shows self-hatred evidence I can’t stand to be alone By my thoughts I’m always overthrown, so - I’ll commit Larseny I’ll commit to Larseny I’ll commit Larseny, oh I’ll commit to Larseny She makes me put away the knife She makes me realize I can’t have a life I’m a victim of reasonless depression Exhibit B shows dependent obsession, and her name is - I’ll commit Larseny I’ll commit to Larseny I’ll commit Larseny, oh I’ll commit to Larseny There’s nothin’; there’s nothin’, there’s nothin’! There’s nothin’ special about myself Yet she tells me she wants no one else I would kill to invade her space If only I could touch her face But every time she’s inside my dreams She tries to run, so I gotta chase, oh!! I’ll commit Larseny I’ll commit to Larseny I’ll commit Larseny, oh I’ll commit to Larseny!! She gives me protein, I’ll give her protein I give her protein, she gives me protein I give her protein, she gives me protein…
4.
Am, C, Am, G 02:45
A song doesn’t always have to be inspired by a bong But sometimes it’s a help if you have a little kelp Killin’ time blowin’ smoke at the ants, now watch them scatter Give it to me, I want it all, hand it on a silver platter Elegantly concise, she peaks only in terse But all I can think of is another verse, chorus, verse I’ll know whenever I figure it out But I, myself, still have my doubts I’m trying to decide if I’m a genius or a moron But all the intellectuals, they always bore me to a yawn - oh! Protest against the government, then complain you can’t park Piss and moan about the sunshine, then sulk when it’s dark You pretend to like her cooking, and at night, she pretends to cum Well, it may sound a little cliche, but all we are is fucking scum You give a bum a dollar, then you shit on them pay day So go ahead, light your foil, we’re all gonna die someday I’ll know whenever I figure it out But I, myself, still have my doubts I’m trying to decide if I’m a genius or a moron But all the intellectuals, they always bore me to a yawn - oh…
5.
(Oh, keep goin’, keep goin’, keep goin’…) Runnin’ ‘round blindy, ’til I hear you call my name When I finally get to you, oh no, what a shame (Oh, keep goin’, keep goin’, keep goin’…) Every day seems the same, nothin’s changed, it’s all the same Standin’ there, by yourself, blamin’ no one but yourself (Oh, keep goin’, keep goin’, keep goin’…) Oh, no, oh, maybe it rhymes with you Oh, no, honey, it rhymes with you Maybe I should have stopped when I heard you talk But, I, you, I rhyme with you, oh! (Oh, keep goin’, keep goin’, keep goin’…) Runnin’ ‘round blindy, ’til I hear you call my name When I finally get to you, oh no, what a shame (Keep goin’, keep goin’, keep goin’…) Every day seems the same, nothin’s changed, it’s all the same Standin’ there, by yourself, blamin’ no one but yourself (Keep goin’, keep goin’, keep goin’…) Oh, no, oh, maybe it rhymes with you Oh, no, oh, it rhymes with you Maybe I should have stopped when I heard you talk But, I, you, I rhyme with you, oh! Runnin’ ‘round blindy, ’til I hear you call my name When I finally get to you, oh no, what a shame (Keep goin’, keep goin’, keep goin’…) Every day seems the same, nothin’s changed, it’s all the same Standin’ there, by yourself, blamin’ no one but yourself (Keep goin’, keep goin’, keep goin’…)
6.
Everyone I see, I picture them as you, instead Try to get my life on track, but your image is burned, in my head So miserable without you, I’m in the dark all alone But right now it’s time for you to be on your own But let me be the one you find when you find yourself You’re putting me down by leaving me by myself I’m sacrificing my life until you’re free And when you’re ready, I pray you’ll open up to me Candlelit dinners, conversation made me high, touch the sky You were perfect just the way you were to me, in my eyes I’m miserable without you, always clutching the phone I lay in bed soaking wet, where is your tone? I hope I’ll be the one you fuck after you’ve fucked yourself You’re wasting all your precious time you give yourself I’d rather not make your life a living hell How long do I have to wait, get out of your shell Oh, so upset Some say I’m unhealthy, yes I’m obsessed, yeah.
7.
If you make it, I’ll still love you If you take it, I won’t judge you If you make it, I’ll still love you If you make it, I won’t judge you If you take it, I’ll still love you If you make it, I won’t judge you I don’t know how to feel about this All I can see is the shallowness in me If you make it, I’ll still love you If you take it, I won’t judge you I won’t judge you, I won’t judge you, I won’t judge you, I’ll still love you, I’ll still judge you oh… I’ll still love (Once every once in a great while, once every once in a great while…) repeat
8.
Deep Cyst 06:10
Coloring pictures in tune with a knife Sure, it may leave a mark, but do you really in this thing called life? Social skies, and racial eyes, 31 days every other block Although they loathe you, you know they’re all talk It’s enchanting when decanting as you’ve realized, you’ve realized enough It’s no wonder as we come down, we always want back, we always want back up But, we ask why Contemplating, you’ll ask why Every single way, you’re just another end, that’s all Stray the subject all you want, try to have a fucking ball Contemplating, you’ll ask why, but does it even really matter? If all we are are tiny ovals of energy, heat and matter And everything is a waste of time, then why do we even bother? (Why? Why?) Oh, why? Are you in disguise? Wash your ears and live in fear; don’t be a faggot with your tears And as you’re trying to pop your cyst, I won’t even say a prayer (Why? Why?) Oh, it’s pretty sick Everyone’s got a nervous tick All we are are tiny ovals of energy, heat and matter When it really comes right down to it, you’ll wonder why we really even matter? (No!) (Why?) Living as parasites, on a sphere with life How did it start, and where does it end? Why does everything seem to blend? Is there more we cannot see? Are we or are we not free? Ohhhh, woahhh, why?…. Oh, what’s going on? Ah, there’s nothing Oh, why do we sleep at night when we no nothin’ is right? (Stop)
9.
Maybe 03:03
Ohhh Maybe it’s on the floor, maybe it’s outside the door Maybe it could be nothin’, maybe it could be somethin’? Do you wanna miss this? Do you wanna miss this? (Maybe I was just talkin’ to myself) (Maybe I was just talkin’ to myself, no one else was there) (I don’t know why I would even want to in the first place) (Why’d I even want to in the first place) (Why?) Ohhh Maybe it’s on the floor, maybe it’s outside the door Maybe it could be nothin’, what if it is somethin’? Do you wanna miss this? Do you wanna miss this? Do you wanna miss this? Do you wanna miss this? Do you wanna miss this? Do you wanna miss this? Ohhh
10.
Everyone’s happy Children are laughing Happy… Happy Easter, Happy Easter, Happy fucking Easter Everyone’s happy, oh The children are laughing, too Would you like to go on a hunt? I know where to go Children are laughing, people are happy, children are old Happy Easter Happy, Happy, Happy fucking Easter It come once a year, it come once a year Come once a year, once a year, who wants ’ta fuckin’ celebrate Break, break out the beer, break out the bong, let’s sing a song for Easter You, you bring the coke (you, you bring the coke) I’ll, I’ll bring a coat Then we’ll celebrate our Easter now It’s Easter now (Happy) Happy fucking Easter to you Sometimes March, sometimes it’s April Sometimes March, this year it’s not (Happy Easter; Happy Easter. It come once a year, it come once a year. Happy Easter; Happy Easter. Bring the bong, let’s sing a song. Happy Easter; Happy Easter. Bring the coke, I’ll bring a coat. Happy Easter; Happy Easter.) (Happy Easter; Happy Easter. Happy Easter; Happy Easter. .retsaE yppaH .retsaE yppaH Happy Easter; Happy Easter.) The next day, no way Made the young cry The next day Happy Easter It’s fuckin’ Easter Ohh… Today is the Easter, today is the Easter, today is the Easter Today is Easter You bring the coke, I’ll bring a coat, ohh.. So it slows down Just when you think, it couldn’t do it, it does It’s fuckin’ Easter Day Jesus Christ is gonna come and… (Happy Easter; Happy Easter. It come once a year, it come once a year. Happy Easter; Happy Easter. Break out the bong, let’s sing a song. Happy Easter; Happy Easter. Bring the coke, I’ll bring a coat. Happy Easter; Happy Easter.)
11.
dark 04:02
It’s so dark in here. There is no way out. I’m forced to face my fears. Where is my God now? Ohh, ohh, it’s so dark in here Ohh, ohh, somebody turn on the light Ohh, ohh, somebody turned out the light It’s so dark in here. There is no way out. Ohh, ohh, it’s so dark in here Ohh, ohh, somebody turn on the light It’s so dark in here…
12.
Hero 03:52
Did you ever notice, I kiss the toilet seat you shit on? Have you ever realized, I don’t have a reason to live, now I’m turned on? Surrounded by isolation, in your very own little matrix, you could get what you want I wish it were true, I wish I were you And then I would have all these responsibilities to flaunt But are you the real deal, what about the dickless lies in our corporate sea called, Life? What about, what about, what about, what about, what about, what about… Somethin’ I gotta tell ya Somethin’ I gotta tell ya, somethin’ about you, somethin’ about me, here it goes now Never could get it out, get it out, get it out of me before Something you should know before you go about me No, I can’t say it, no, I can’t say it Never could get it out, get it out, get it out, get it out of me, oh Here it goes, you’ll have to excuse me, I’m not the best with my words Fuck it, here it goes! Ever since I met you, I feel I’ve been besmirched I don’t really have a reason anymore to be on this earth You’re naive to your failed experiment And if it were up to you, it would be no accident Ohh, ohh, ohh Here it goes.. Only thing I could tell ya, one thing I could tell ya Ohh, hoh, hohh, you’re my hero, hero! Whoa, hoh, whoa You’re my hero, hero Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa You’re my hero Somethin’ I gotta tell ya, somethin’ I gotta tell ya You’re my hero, hero Somethin’ you should know before you go You’re my hero, hero, hero Oh, whoa, whoa You’re my hero, my hero Did you ever notice, I kiss the toilet seat you shit on? Have you ever realized, I don’t have a reason to live, even though I’m turned on? Surrounded by isolation, in your very own little matrix, you could get what you want I wish it were true, I wish I were you And then I’d have all these responsibilities to flaunt But are you really real, what about the gutless lies, our corporate sea called, Life? What about, what about, what about, what about… You’re my hero Ah, hoh, hoh, whoa You’re my hero Hero, no, ohh You’re my hero, my hero, my hero, my hero, my ohh
13.
Only One 13:01
I think I’ve fallen for you, or maybe I’ve gone crazy I may have felt this before, but my memory’s hazy When you’re not around, I find it hard to function And when you’re back in town, I find it hard to function Think you’re the only one, I wish you were near me And yet I stifle myself, in case you learn to fear me Ohh, I’ve been without you too long And, ohh, it’s hard to keep goin’ strong, for too long, yeah Oh, so why am I sitting here, holdin’ my dong - tell me! Oh, it’s cold as hell if that makes sense I FUCKING MISS YOU!!! I’m wasting my moment spent I FUCKING CRAVE YOU!!! It’s cold as hell if that makes sense I FUCKING MISS YOU!!! You’re wasting my moment spent I FUCKING CRAVE YOU!!! You’re the only one, you’re the only one You’re the only one, you’re the only one You’re the only one, you’re my moon and my sun, the only one One who’s captured my soul, the only one With I wanna have fun, the only one With who I can grow old, the only one With I wanna have fun, the only one… repeat, ad nauseam! Soon! Soon there may be, soon you may see Maybe you, the only one is me Hey! Call me insane, give me the blame But mutual to you would be lame No! There is no cure, it’s all a blur In so many words, it’s for sure (I used to look at you on the window sill sill, but you went away, every day, went away) repeat Look inside, look inside, don’t confide Will you tell me what you see? Look around, is there something you’ve found? Could you tell me you now believe? What’s it called, what’s it called, is it small? Does it light you up at all? End your life, end your life, and it’s nice Now whose name do you wanna call? You’re the only one, you’re the only one You’re the only one, you’re the only one You’re the only one, you’re my moon and my sun, the only one One who’s captured my soul, the only one With I wanna have fun, the only one With who I can grow old, the only one With I wanna have fun, the only one… repeat, ad nauseam, agaaain!

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released September 11, 2005

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duffle band California

Since 2003, one man Duffle Band plays and records kind of quirky, kind of dark, kind of silly, kind of stark, often poppy, seldom cocky, very rock-y songs. Sometimes he does so very often, other times not so often (with a gap of 6 years between his 2nd & 3rd albums!). Sometimes he uses just an acoustic guitar and a tape recorder, other times he layers on piles of sound with a MacBook Pro yo. Yee. ... more

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